Chronic Pain, Depression, Dialectical Behavioral Therapy, Fibromyalgia, Health, Radical Acceptance

Letting Go of Control

Today’s post is a follow on of the previous post about Radical Acceptance. While at the clinic, we were given this story to read and I thought that it would be great to share it with you, as it is a perfect example of Radical Acceptance.

“I know, when I look at my life, that I have tried to control too many situations so they will turn out the way I think is best. And I know now, that so often when I have done this, I end up unhappy, frustrated and unfulfilled, not knowing why at the time. This is a pattern I have followed all my life. One that doesn’t really seem to be working for me, now that I am aware of how fruitless it is to attempt to control things that just can’t BE controlled.

I didn’t know that by “letting go” and having more faith, that things would always turn out for the best and that I would free myself of my never-ending cycle of control, frustration and disappointment. I didn’t realize that it is not always possible for me to know how things should go in order for the greater good to occur. And I didn’t know that by having a little patience, I would be demonstrating faith in the divine plan.

If I have shown less than faith in something greater than myself throughout my life, I know better now, and I want to begin to live the faith I have always heard about and even thought I had but didn’t really.

I know that letting go of my need to judge and control things in my life is a process, and I don’t expect to do it well overnight. But it does represent a new way of seeing how life can work when you believe that you do not always know what the best outcome will be. I make the commitment now to begin to find my way down the path of trust in a wisdom greater than my own could ever be.

I can begin now to see everything in my life with new eyes – to see every situation I encounter as a lesson and every person I encounter as a teacher. In this way I will open my eyes to a more loving, positive and exciting way of living; one that is infused with the wonder of NOT KNOWING. Because that is where the true mystery of life is and it requires my willingness to just let it be a mystery.

I know that as I continue to see my life as a series of lessons, I will feel less and less need to set an agenda of my own, and instead can begin to step aside a little, in order to allow my life to unfold naturally. I am ready to begin to trust in this process, and I know it is a way which will bring miracles into my life in the form of a deeper understanding of who I really am, why I am here, and how interconnected I am with all living beings.

I am ready now to be open to all new situations, to not fight against anything just because I am afraid it might be a bad or negative or painful experience. I am willing to be open to the possibility that my greatest joy may lie waiting for me just around the corner, and it may be disguised in one such seemingly negative experience.

I acknowledge that I may sometimes only see how necessary a situation was for my happiness and personal growth after it has occurred. That I may need to experience what at the time feels painful or difficult or against my own judgement in order to learn the lesson that only later will I recognize as a loving, spiritual step in the direction of greater joy and self-realization for me in this life.

And I know that as these life lessons unfold more and more naturally for me because I allow them to, I will begin to accept myself, my life, and others in a more profound way, and I will have so much more richness in my life to share that I will begin to actually seek out experiences which before I might have avoided.

I understand that life is no more and no less than a series of lessons, and I play the role of student who is here only to learn and then pass that learning along to others in a gentle, non-judgemental way. And that the purpose underlying all the lessons I seem to be learning is just this: to grow in wisdom and to learn to love myself and others better.

That is all that was ever expected of me.

That is why I am here”.

Author Unknown

Letting go of Control

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